Gentle Start Up. Rules for Real Relationships

Anger is important, it provides information. When we come in hot, we only inflame the situation. As Irvin Yalom wisely said, strike when the iron is cold. In couples therapy there is no room to come in yelling and degrading your partner, it is ineffective, mean and simply does not work. Anger is valid, it is not okay to yell at your partner.

Sometimes you do need a deliberate space to begin to practice this new communication style and this is where couples therapy comes in.


It always seems impossible until it's done:
Nelson Mandela